God can have everything else... except my career.

Are You really jealous over me?

And when my knees hit the ground, weary, exhausted, and blistered. Do not think that I have fallen, for herein lies the source of my strength - Amaka.

I went jogging this morning - the first in over a year. No, I didn’t make new resolutions this year, and even if I did, exercise wouldn’t be a part of it. I guess I just desired more actions than words. I got my running shoes out of the box last night and by 6:30 this morning, I had them on and walked to the street.

After the jog, I felt good because I had been previously discouraged from exercising and encouraged to eat more.

I went jogging for the second time (a week later), but this time, I added some pilates stretching. After that, I got ready and went to church for Sunday services, and although I arrived a little bit later than I wanted to, I felt really good about myself—like, go girl!

That’s a sneak peek into my life. When I achieve success, I think to myself, “You’ve really got this,” and then I ignore any other contrary opinion.

It’s easy to compartmentalize my faith. It’s easy to say Yes God you can have my financial and family problems but you see my career God? I get to run it. I can handle it.

I would literally talk to God in abundance about everything but when it was about my career, I’d sprinkle prayers, God please help me get this job, God please grant me favor before my employers. And that’s when I’m in a good mood to pray about my career.

What I didn’t understand was that my actions meant - I trust you with every other thing, even my eternal salvation but I don’t trust you enough to lead me when it comes to this aspect of my life. Looking back now, I’m wondering where my head was at because that was some fooling thinking.

The thing about God is that if you think you can handle anything in your wisdom, He will let you handle it. No fussing, just letting you go. After going around in circles, guess who you’d come running back to?

To God, this attitude is called pride but guess what? He doesn’t want you to stay far from Him because He hates pride, He wants you to come to Him for help.

That was me, I came running back to God after I received a lot of rejections in my career. But to be honest, in the first place, I really felt deep down that maybe God didn’t care about my career path and so I struggled with talking to Him about it.

But recently, I learned that God is jealous over my life and cares so much that He knows every single strand of hair on my head. What good father isn’t interested in his child's affairs?

He wants to know. God wants to know what you’re up to. So mine was my career, but yours may be your love life, your insecurities, your mental illness, or your financial situation.

Don’t ever think that God doesn’t love you enough to be interested in everything that concerns you.

Till next time,

Love and Light from Amaka.